36. I tell jokes to pay my greens fees." Feel free […] A golf course should aspire to generate as much energy as it consumes - golf should be leading the way toward energy net zero. She’s crotchety and eccentric, but also elegant, and anyone who doesn’t fall in love with her has no imagination.” — Tony Lema, winner of the 1964 British Open at St. Andrews. 33. It took one afternoon on the golf course.”. I don't even know what to say. A golf course is nothing but a pool room moved outdoors. The latest member was having a ball. I play off six. I did envisage being this successful as a player, but not all the hysteria around it off the golf course. I'm still freaked out that I met him. I would rather be chopping shallots. I've won as many golf tournaments hitting the ball badly as I have hitting the ball well. Golf Quotes - BrainyQuote. A highly regarded course designer himself, he once said, "A golf course should be a bit wild, at least in some corners. 4. ” -Bobby Jones. This place was designed by Darth Vader.” — Ben Crenshaw at the inaugural Players Championship, 1982, “Pebble Beach is Alcatraz with grass.” — Bob Hope, “I feel like I’m back visiting an old grandmother. The first tee shot soared through space. So OK, I came out boxing with a friend - thinking we would just spar around - but the guy walked out, hit me, and knocked me out with one stroke. Course Rater Confidential: What are the best desert golf courses in the country? You can spend the money on new housing for poor people and the homeless, or you can spend it on a football stadium or a golf course. It's real!'. There is a luxury resort with hotels, restaurants, nightlife and a golf course. THE GOLF COURSE IN THE SKY. I just like to go out on the golf course and play. I've never been one to throw clubs, break clubs, or use bad language on the golf course. I guess I try to be more sensitive to my private life - to take a breath of fresh air and be in the countryside or on a golf course. I expected a clock to fall out of the trees and hit me in the face.” — David Feherty, “After playing Ballybunion for the first time, a man would think that the game of golf originated here.” — Tom Watson, PHOTOS: Meet Chambers Bay, Home of the 2015 U.S. Open, “I love Merion and I don’t even know her last name.” — Lee Trevino, When Lee Westwood first saw the course he said, “I’d been told there are 10 difficult holes and eight impossible ones. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.’ – Lee Trevino Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.”. “11,” responded Nicklaus. “Maybe 12.”, “Golf’s Holy Grail — a genius course.” — Johnny Miller, “I cannot deny that on a breezy summer’s day, Fishers Island is one of the most idyllic places possible for a round of golf.” — Tom Doak, After weeks of tromping around the yucca-choked sandhills of Hutchinson in the 1930s, architect Perry Maxwell pronounced, “There are 118 good golf holes here. There are certainly way better golf courses, but I've always found this to be a fun layout. "If you're caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. 36. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. I know the big water tower with the Firestone ball on top, I grew up with this. I do spend really focused time with my wife, my kids, grandkids, and so when I'm doing something or on a golf course, work has stopped. In this post, we are going to share with you 65+ Golf slogans, chants & one-liners. I think the PGA TOUR and THE PLAYERS would like it a major, especially Tiger. A “gimme” can best be defined as an agreement between two golfers, neither of whom can putt very well. It took one afternoon on the golf course.” – Hank Aaron. Golf Funny Sayings | Golf Lessons […] 20 Funny Golf Sayings and Inspirational Golf Quotes – Haggin Oaks – Here is a collection of 20 golf quotes – some are inspirational and others are golf sayings that will hopefully bring a smile to your face. Copy. ― Tiger Woods. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. I was out on the golf course, a guy came riding out in a golf cart and said, Did you know that Elvis died? I get it on the golf course. Start Slideshow. I don't like going to the mall. Home » Browse Quotes By Subject » Funny Golf Quotes Quotes. It is at the same time rewarding and maddening - and it is without a doubt the greatest game mankind has ever invented. I love looking good - obviously, on the golf course I like looking sharp, that's for sure. If you play it, it's recreation. Like. We did some demonstrations, and they put me in a theater one night and wanted me to box. BrainyQuote has been providing inspirational quotes since 2001 to our worldwide community. I like to come downstairs and go right onto the course. Make sure to check out our sport and other funny jokes categories. Best Golf Quotes. Golf is deceptively simple and endlessly complicated; it satisfies the soul and frustrates the intellect. I knew better. The fans have always helped me get through good things and bad things on and off the golf course. I've played with golfers who've done that, and I really hate to see it. Ask any Tour pro or celebrity amateur golfer for their opinion about a Top 100 golf course and you usually elicit a funny, clever or occasionally nasty retort. Golf was my first glimpse of comedy. It's something I've enjoyed, but I also like to get away from the golf course. They might come in the office and ask me questions and I'd certainly answer their questions, but I'm not involved in the site visits or anything else. It's such a beautiful and fabulous golf course. To help inspire my fellow golf-lovers who spend more time in the office than on the course, here are 10 quotes about golf that can easily be applied to corporate life. Every golf course should have its carbon rating on the scorecard, alongside its Course Rating, Slope, par and yardage. The Old Testament is responsible for more atheism, agnosticism, disbelief - call it what you will - than any book ever written. If you work at it, it's golf." Select from the best slogans for shirts, banners, posters, t-shirts, jerseys, signs, warm-ups, locker room and more. I've been playing golf as long as I've been dancing, since I was 13 or 14. 35. I was a caddy when I was a kid. I can't imagine anybody who showed up at Firestone for the first time who felt like they knew it better than I did. I never had any alcohol on the golf course that I remember, except for one time, and that was the L.A. Open. You arrive by ferry from Costa Rica. Golf quotes about skill and philosophy. For more news that golfers everywhere are talking about, follow @golf_com on Twitter, like us on Facebook, and subscribe to our YouTube video channel. I think every part of your game, on this golf course, needs to be good. It sees more than 20,000 visitors every day. Pete Dye introduced me to golf course design back in the 1960's. ― Hank Aaron. The world is full of people who would like nothing better than to spend six hours on a golf course. And Oakmont just fit my eye. “A shot that goes in the cup is pure luck, but a shot to within two feet of the flag is skill.” – Ben Hogan. Travel mailbag: What do I need to know when playing golf with caddies? Well at least I heard his name several times. If you've driven over to the gay section of Los Angeles, it's like a golf course... Real estate values go 'boom!'. “He that can have patience can have what he will.”-Benjamin Franklin. I found Jesus on the golf course. My grandfather played, too. I just love hanging out with good company on a great, fun golf course. At the golf course in the sky . Copy. If there's a golf course in heaven, I hope it's like Augusta National. While all courses had some downtime due to the Covid pandemic, they let this golf course rot and did little to get it back in shape since. Arnold Palmer. “Patience, persistence and perspiration make an unbeatable combination for success.” -Napoleon Hill. “Golf is a good walk spoiled.” —Mark Twain. Author Unknown; Golf is a game where … Bobby Jones: “ Competitive golf is played mainly on a five-and-a-half-inch course, the space between your ears.” Bob Hope: “ Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.” “If you watch a game, it's fun. “The most important shot in golf is the next one.” —Ben Hogan. 833. Then I was on the boxing team. Some of golf's greatest players also count among the game's wisest. He came to my hometown Columbus, Ohio to work on The Golf Club. Mar 5, 2012 - Golf humor and inspiration. GOLF.com and GOLF Magazine are published by EB GOLF MEDIA LLC, a division of 8AM GOLF, Best Quotes About the Best Golf Courses in the World, How this new Nicklaus Design course will help extend golf’s reach. I’m still trying to work out which the 10 difficult holes are.”, “If it were human, Spyglass would have a knife in its teeth, a patch on its eye, a ring in its ear, tobacco in its beard and a blunderbuss in its hand.” — Jim Murray, Hall-of-Fame sportswriter, When asked during the 1970 U.S. Open what the course lacked, Dave Hill famously responded, “Eighty acres of corn and a few cows. To be consistently effective, you must put a certain distance between yourself and what happens to you on the golf course. I'm just not into knowing brands. The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. Bringing a wondrous, beaming smile. It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. Explore 182 Golf Course Quotes by authors including Hank Aaron, Lee Trevino, and Billy Graham at BrainyQuote. A kid grows up a lot faster on the golf course. ‘If you’re caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Quotes tagged as "golf-course" Showing 1-1 of 1 “An expanse of short green grass undulated around sand traps and manicured trees. If a man comes home with sand in his cuffs and cockleburs in his pants, don’t ask him what he shot. "If you think golf is relaxing, you're not playing it right." I am happy to be associated with a company with such outstanding qualities. When I see my friends collapse, I run for the paramedics. Ring the nearest golf course. ~Miller Barber Duffers who consistently shank their balls are urged to buy and study Shanks – No Thanks by R.K. Hoffman, or in extreme cases, M.S. What makes a great golf course is continuity and variety: right-to-left holes, left-to-right holes. I could have watched more film, that's for sure. That's how the game should be played. One advantage Joe Paterno had over me was that he didn't play golf. “Cypress Point is such a beautiful place, but it’s also very exclusive. I do my best on the golf course. This is a must stop place on any trip through Death Valley even if you don't play golf. I thank God I'm good at something. 34. See more ideas about golf quotes, golf humor, golf. I'll never forget those things. “The only thing a golfer needs is more daylight.” —Ben Hogan. A lot of guys can go out and hit a golf ball, but they have no idea how to manage what they do with the ball. This is not indifference, it's detachment. It keeps us going. “It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. 'Jurassic World' takes place in a fully functional park on Isla Nublar. tags: fashion , golf , race , racial-profiling , sports. Rally your golf team, inspire your fans and liven up the crowd! Golf's my job; it's not my life. I think that Pebble Beach is my favorite golf course to go to. I'm not really like the other girls. “Golf is a game that is played on a five-inch course – the distance between your ears. All I have to do is eliminate 100 of them.”, Twenty years after Donald Ross designed Aronimink, he visited the layout and declared, “I intended to make this course my masterpiece, but not until today did I realize I built better than I knew.”, “I’m glad I brought this course, this monster, to its knees.” — Ben Hogan, following his final-round 67 at the 1951 U.S. Open, “The man who doesn’t feel emotionally stirred when he golfs at Pinehurst beneath these clear blue skies and with the pine fragrance in his nostrils is one who should be ruled out of golf for life.” — Tommy Armour, “It’s Star Wars golf. Funny, positive, motivational, short, inspirational, teamwork, famous, winning and girls golf quotes for coaches, players and parents. Here’s our huge collection of golfing slogans, phrases, sayings, mottos, and quotes. We butchered every year. I was on the golf course rather than being in lessons, but I can play better now than I could then. The turf war for the Dollar Store continues. You can also support your favorite player using these slogans & lines. My father was a very good golfer and he got me started early. Despite their vaunted status, many of the greatest golf courses in the world can inspire frustration, rage and awe in even the best players; some inspire all three at the same time. I'll do that five days in a row. If I get a week off, I'll go to a hotel that has a golf course. I kind of grew up on the golf course. It's a really good place for me to be, on the golf course. 23 Comments. I think Augusta is my favorite place to go play golf. Exercise? It was just something that the Kroft family did. They just find their shoelaces and bags.” — Bob Hope, PHOTOS: The Top 100 Golf Courses in the World, Jack Nicklaus was once asked to rate a handful of classic courses on a scale of difficulty from 1 to 10. I think a leader has to really be a balanced, whole and healthy person personally in order to be the best leader on the job. 89 likes. I've always - I grew up on the old-style traditional type of golf course, tree lined and all small greens, big undulations. I have great respect for Jaypee Greens as a company that has produced a truly world class, 24-carat, championship golf course. “It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. Golf slogans, golf phrases and golf sayings can unite, inspire and motivate. Discover and share Golf Friendship Quotes. You've got to hit every club in the bag. How come, then, that you invariably send your ball crashing into the remaining 10 per cent? As eighteen flags flew at half mast, and. A selection of our favorite quotes about the game. Golf is fun and feels really good. Leisure time is only leisure time when it is earned; otherwise, leisure time devolves into soul-killing lassitude. A “Lion” would never cheat on his wife but a “Tiger Wood”. If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Topgolf is taking over a golf course — here’s why that could work so well. I particularly enjoy playing golf with my best friend, former Manchester United player Dwight Yorke. "If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of … I took my basic training on a golf course in Florida. It is a beautiful hotel with a great golf course, which made it even better. I feel the same way about old golf courses. I always knew I wanted to play golf and go to college. Age, they say, is only important if you're cheese. When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. A weed now and again would be a great relief." How about Winged Foot, Nicklaus was asked. Funny Golf Quotes and Sayings. A Nicklaus Design golf course is done by the guys in my company that I work with, that have been trained in my vision, and they do what they think I might do. Show the world how much you love this sport or express your feelings using these slogans. A great golf course both frees and challenges a golfer's mind. They ruined a good farm when they built this course.”, “If I owned a Rembrandt and it had some dull colors, I don’t think I’d go put reds and yellows in there just to brighten it up. Achievements on the golf course are not what matters, decency and honesty are what matter. Submitted by: David. Copy. The great poet preferred daffodils to mown fairways. It has emptied more churches than all the counter-attractions of cinema, motor-bicycle and golf course. Enjoy these funny golf jokes and puns. Never try to keep more than 300 separate thoughts in your mind during your swing. First of all my golfing experience spans all corners of the World - Brazil, New Zealand, L.A. And I think the best place is when you play with friends. It was like I had kinda been expecting it. Golf Course Achievement Quotes: “Achievements on the golf course are not what matters, decency and honesty are what matter.” (Tiger Woods) — Membership Information Corporate Events Tournament Information Social Events Other If you play it, it's recreation. “Most people play a fair game of golf, If you watch them.” —Joey Adams. “True sportsmanship is… I am a fanatic when it comes to the game, so I need to know there is a golf course not far away when I'm on holiday, such as when I stayed at the Four Seasons Resort Nevis. The Hicks and the McMurrays defend the majestic Canada Goose down at the local golf course. I met Michael Jordan on a golf course! 34. ~Author Unknown I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced. I try to play the game like a gentleman and give everyone respect. Funny Golf Quotes and Sayings. He rated Augusta National, Oak Hill, St. Andrews and Seminole all 8s. Here it is! Enjoy over 10.000 Jokes and Quotes! I saw how people lived on the other side of the tracks, the upper crust and the WASPs at the country club. For me to travel to Akron the first time, 'Oh, my gosh, I can't wait, I know every hole on this golf course. The course looks immaculate and there is a friendly welcome awaiting in the pro shop but because of the heat check opening times if you want to buy a souvenir. Freed from the gravity of the situation. Unfortunately, the management and maintenance here is a disgrace. Baltusrol and Pebble Beach merited a 10. I have to admit, I sometimes wonder how much more successful I would have been as a coach had it not been for my spending summers on the golf course. I learned one thing from jumping motorcycles that was of great value on the golf course, the putting green especially: Whatever you do, don't come up short. I am learning about the business side of it. Download App. Whenever I walk off the golf course, I thank God that I'm able to tell a joke. I'm very excited every time I'm at Augusta National. There's a reason so many new retirees, freed from the treadmill of work, promptly keel over on the golf course: Work fulfills us. I try to carry myself well, and don't do anything outrageous. 2. It is the lowest golf course in the world so worth a photo stop! 90. I like to get out on a golf course as often as I can. No other game combines the wonder of nature with the discipline of sport in such carefully planned ways. I'm not a huge shopper. I think he would like it. Glasses were soberly raised high. tags: baseball , golf , humor , sports. Why Wild Horse Golf Club is the best course you’ve never heard of. Entertainment is just a sideline. JASON DAY: “When you come to an event like this and you’re playing in a tournament on a large scale, it feels like a major. General Bob Hope Golf Quotes "Golf is my real profession. But I have a lot of great partners that help me with all those things. I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. If I did something like that, my dad would come get the putter and hit me upside the head with it. I grew up in poverty on the edge of a golf course. or a wine. You need to drive it well, hit your irons well, and always, if you want to have a chance to win a Major, then you've got to putt it well. When you have a masterpiece, I sure wouldn’t tinker with it.” — Raymond Floyd, ahead of the 1989 U.S. Open, commenting on Tom Fazio’s pre-1980 changes to the course, “It should almost be a prerequisite to play Castle Stuart before you’re allowed to design golf courses nowadays.” — Phil Mickelson at the 2011 Scottish Open, “Foursomes have left the first tee there and have never been seen again. Add to his major list. It has elements of a biological preserve, a safari, a zoo, and a theme park. They drove out forty members.” — Bob Hope, “(Oakmont possesses) all the charm of a sock to the head.” — Gene Sarazen, “Augusta National is like playing a Salvador Dali landscape. 35. Short Funny Golf Quotes and Sayings. To a kind, down to earth face . Up ahead, a multi-winged clubhouse loomed. I try hard to be a positive role model, especially on the golf course. Are you looking for Golf slogans, phrases & one-liners? We had chickens and pigs in our yards. Ask any Tour pro or celebrity amateur golfer for their opinion about a Top 100 golf course and you usually elicit a funny, clever or occasionally nasty retort. They had a very successful membership drive last month. Golf quotes. Here are some of the best quips ever about our greatest courses. It is the best experience when we can get together on a golf course. I see a lot of actors for whom life becomes one big schedule. “I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.” – G.K. Chesterton “Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it’s open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.” – Dave Barry “Hockey is a sport for white men. They also say, if you are stuck behind one on a golf course, that a tree is 90 per cent air. I haven't played a full round of golf yet, but I did make two pars my first time out on a golf course. Golf teaches you how to behave. I'm in Houston on the golf course doing 18 holes every day that I don't have to work or it rains. I just don't want an early tee time. “A perfectly straight shot with a big club is a fluke.” A list of 36 famous and funny quotes about golf from Tiger Woods and others. If you work at it, it's golf.” Not even God can hit a 1-iron." A big part of managing a golf course is managing your swing on the course. If I played golf, I'd be on the golf course every day, but I just can't wear those dumb pants. ‘Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness.’ – William Wordsworth. And I just said, Well, there you go. And there are dinosaurs. “The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.” – Billy Graham, minister “If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball.” – Jack Lemmon, actor “It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.” – Mark Twain, author Discover and share Funny Golf Quotes For Retirement. Perfect if you like playing or watching golf. "If you watch a game, it's fun. Not even God can hit a 1-iron. But he's also written with great appreciation about Augusta National and the design choices made by Mackenzie and Jones. Golf is a game that is played on a five-inch course Votes: 4 Bobby Jones Pebble (103 quotes) I think Pebble Beach is kind of a unique place on the planet.
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